2020

It all started with an PA announcement at 2:39pm – the end of the school day, Thursday, March 12th – that said, “Students, be sure to take your chromebooks and your chargers home today.” Someone in admin had an inkling that the Governor was going to shut down schools – ya’ know, two weeks to flatten the curve. Teachers came in on the 13th anxious about what this meant for our students, for our families, for our lives. After seeing the news from China, Italy, and Spain, we dreaded that this was about to be bigger than we could’ve imagined. And it was. 

Toilet paper instantly became scarce. Schools became ghost towns. Businesses were impacted in an instant. Churches moved online. Community became isolated. 

Earlier that week we (teachers) had joked that this weekend was Friday the 13th, time change, and a full moon. Coronavirus couldn’t scare us. HA!

Universities began to send students home. My daughter’s university was one of the last ones to close. She was having a GREAT school year, with new friends and spiritual growth. She was not happy about returning home early. Chalk up another disappointment.

By that point we were making plans for our foreign-exchange student, Mari, to return to Japan, 2 months early. 

It was hard. It was heavy. It was stressful.

Two weeks became two months. With a little reprieve in the summer, fears only mounted that the fall and winter would be even worse. 

We navigated, as so many did, one graduating high school and one getting married, never knowing what the following week would bring, let alone the following month. We endured the abrupt ending of a job – a passion, a career, income. We grappled through emotions and relationships. 

We complied with all the “new normals” even when things didn’t make sense. Some things still don’t make sense. 

Of course, what would a Global Pandemic be without a crazy national election year and racial division? The news was weighty. Narratives were pushed and others were silenced. You had (have) to go through an escape room to find an inkling of truth. And with time on our hands and nothing else to do but assume, react, and disseminate – tensions escalated, ravines built, bridges burned. The ramifications will have detrimental long-term effects, like some that have suffered through the virus. 

Some new normals are here to stay. Division, corruption, power, skepticism, wariness. Maybe they’re not new… but awareness is newly heightened. There are new fears. New worries. New frustrations. 

A routine health exam revealed that although anxiety is not something I deal with, my physical body had taken the brunt of the past year. So, with the one year anniversary of all heck breaking loose coming up and a couple of weeks to reflect on its effects on me personally, I’m processing through 2020-2021. Aren’t we all?

The grief. The loss. The struggle. 

I pushed through. Many of us did (are). Medical heroes. Essential Heroes. Educators. All of us. There are people that count on us to keep going, to lead, to encourage. For me it’s a calling and a privilege. However, it’s not without effect, repercussion, and aftermath. So, now it’s time to deal. 

Sure, there’s some (a lot if you look for it) good from this past year. Slowing down. Family time. Intentional connection. Becoming aware of weaknesses, deficits, entrapments. Being cognizant of priorities, commitments, ambitions. 

There’s also been a lot of trauma. Trauma from loss. Trauma from disappointments. Trauma from the continual unknown. Trauma from the “new normal.” This weekend (@ IF:Gathering) a mental health professional shared that naming IT starts the path to healing. What loss have you experienced? Artist, David Rees, epitomized 2020 with his song “dos mil veinte” (twenty twenty). I turned this song into a lesson plan for one of my classes and it was a good time of reflection and awareness. 

I could not have gotten through this year without my amazing family, my “Corona Puppy” and other pups, great friends, and most of all my faithful God and Savior Jesus Christ. Joni Eareckson Tada reminded me this weekend that even this year, “The Lord stood by me and strengthened me” (2 Tim. 4:17). He really did. Every day.  With each new announcement. With each new change. With each new challenge. Paul also wrote that, “Even though our outer person is being destroyed, our inner person is being renewed day by day” (2 Cor. 4:16). 

Jesus has been and continues to be the anchor for my soul. Those of us who have surrendered our lives to God can hold on to this HOPE in Him. I hope for whoever reading this also has that hope. Scripture reminds us that, “‘Though the mountains move and the hills shake (ahem – 2020), My love will not be removed from you and My covenant of peace will not be shaken’, says your compassionate Lord” (Isaiah 54:10). And Hebrews 6:19 affirms that “we who have fled to Him for refuge can have great confidence as we hold on to the HOPE that lies before us. This HOPE is a strong and trustworthy ANCHOR for our souls.” This hope, this peace is found in Jesus. No matter who is president. No matter what variant threatens. No matter what is taken away. No matter what… (fill in the blank). Job, from the Bible, had everyone and everything that meant anything to him taken from him and yet he said, “The Lord gave, and the Lord has taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord” (Job 1:21).  

I pray that my heart stays anchored in the HOPE that I have in Jesus, that even if mountains fall and the earth shakes – like all we’ve lived through this past year – that I will focus on, worship, and bless the Name of the Lord. My Strong Tower. My Refuge. My Hope. I pray that for you too. 

“Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles of any kind come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy. For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow” (James 1:2-4). No matter how well we handled this year or how this year handled us, I’m confident we have all grown. The sun is rising on the horizon and a new day is coming. 

“Rejoice in our confident hope. Be patient in trouble, and keep on praying” (Rom. 12:12). 

Rising Above

Heyyyyy – my flesh doesn’t want to touch this with a 10 ft pole but my spirit is burdened. So, if you would humbly like to join me on this political-spiritual journey, I invite you to pray first – ask God to open your heart and mind to his truth and leading – and come along. I don’t have all the answers and welcome feedback, but my heart’s desire is to follow and bring honor to Jesus – in ALL that I do and say. (Disclaimer – this is in no way/shape/form an endorsement for any political candidate, party, or issue. In fact, it’s quite the opposite so feel free to breathe a sigh of relief ~ I don’t really care who or what you’re voting for :0). If you’re willing, let’s take a dive into what is a world vs a biblical view, how idols creep into our lives and we don’t even realize it, how the bible instructs us to act and live, and finally where our HOPE comes from. 

The first stop on this journey is to compare worldviews – a modern society worldview and a biblical worldview. Worldviews of different societies, cultures, or experiences (no matter the society/country/region/community) focus on the here and now, what is earthly and what is seen. It focuses on cultures that ebb and flow and is unique to the country, region, or community. A biblical worldview, however, focuses on the eternal. It focuses on the unchanging truth of the Word of God and is the same across the world. Here are some verses that serve as a reminder of the eternality of the Word of God. Read these slowly, don’t let familiarity cause you to gloss over them.

“Do not focus on what is seen, but on what is unseen. For what is seen is temporary, but what is unseen is eternal.” ‭‭2 Cor. ‭4:18‬ ‭

“The grass withers, the flowers fade, but the word of our God remains forever.” ‭‭Isaiah‬ ‭40:8‬ ‭

“The counsel of the Lord stands forever, the plans of His heart from generation to generation.” ‭‭Psalms‬ ‭33:11‬ 

“Heaven and earth will pass away, but My words will never pass away.” ‭‭Matthew‬ ‭24:35‬ 

“Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.” ‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭13:8‬ 

One hiccup on this journey is when we become so obsessed with a political candidate or issue (or against a candidate or issue) that we lose our witness as a follower of Jesus. Our God is a jealous God – not in a sleazy boyfriend kind of way. He’s jealous FOR us to make him our number One. Hmmm, if you don’t know him well, it seems a little self-serving that he wants us to make HIM number one. But, don’t forget that he is the One True God (John 1:1, 17:3). He is the Creator of the universe (Gen. 1:1, Col. 1:16). And he LOVES us so much he sent his Son to DIE in our place (John 3:16, Rom. 5:8). This love demonstrates that he is FOR us. Following Him and his way is the best thing for us. So, he doesn’t want anything to come before him. Remember, “Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour” (1 Peter 5:8) and he is slick. You don’t even realize when he has moved in. However, the Bible is clear when it says, “You shall have no other gods before me” (Ex. 20:3). 1 Chron. 16:26 goes on to say, “For all the gods of the peoples are idols, but the Lord made the heavens.” John 3:30 reminds us that, “He must increase, but I must decrease.” He also reminds us that, “Pride comes before destruction, and an arrogant spirit before a fall” (‭Prov. ‭16:18‬). Is the social media post or family dinner discussion going to change anyone’s mind? Is it going to drive division? Is it going to harm our relationships with loved ones? Let’s be like Jesus and put RELATIONSHIPS before being RIGHT. 

You’re still here? Wow! Ok, let’s talk about Jesus. He was passionate about many things and his teachings were not always well-received. In fact, his position on things often caused quite a stir, division even. However, it did not change his CHARACTER – that he is kind, good, loving, and a patient man with self-control. With as much (more actually) passion as we have towards all things politics, we should have a passion to be more and more like Christ every day. What did that look like in his life and what could it look like in ours? 

“Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you” (Eph. 4:32). 

“Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience… Above all, put on love — the perfect bond of unity” (‭‭Col.  ‭3:12,14‬). I don’t see this on social media… we can do better, Christians. We must. And may I add, I don’t always get this right, in fact, here’s a free pass to provide me some accountability.

“Love one another with brotherly affection. Outdo one another in showing honor” (Rom. 12:10). 

Verses about hate:

“Finally, all of you, have unity of mind, sympathy, brotherly love, a tender heart, and a humble mind” (1 Peter 3:8). 

“But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin” (1 John 1:17). 

Maybe now you can see why my heart is aching. We, collectively, have lost our way (side note – – I read Isaiah Isaiah 63:17-19 this week and it literally opened the floodgates of tears). But, what makes the ache even worse is the weight of HOPE I see put on different things or people. Where does our hope come from? Politically, I do my homework and research each election (big or small) and vote closest to who or what is most closely aligned with the ideals I’d like to see in the world (community). Over the years, I have voted blue and won and voted blue and lost. I have voted red and won and have voted red and lost. Yes, I’m happy when my vote wins and I’m bummed when my vote loses. But my vote, my political party, political issues, world events are not where my hope comes from. My hope comes from the LORD. My. Hope. Comes. From. The. Lord. What breaks my heart is when people have placed all of their hope in a political candidate or issue and it doesn’t pass or the candidate doesn’t win and they’re crushed. I don’t mean disappointed, I mean can’t-get-out-of-bed-crushed. I was reminded of the mood the day after the 2016 election with this twitter thread. People were in shock because of the confident predictions from the previous days, but there was a doom and gloom like never before among many who had voted a certain way (as seen in the twitter thread). If you’re a Christ follower, our hope is FIRST in Jesus. And this hope does not disappoint (see Rom. 5:5). Back to 1 Cor – “We do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day… For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal” (vs. 16-18). One final note about hope – “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope” (Rom. 15:13). If you don’t know about this hope that you too can have in Jesus, please send me a private message and I’ll be glad to chat further with you. 

If you’re still reading, bless you! HA! I pray your spirit is moved to keep the main thing the main thing, rising above the divisive political discourse that so easily sucks us in. That the truths of the Bible supersede temporary earthly worldviews. That you and I will put nothing before our devotion and love for the Lord. That as a follower of Christ, we will strive every day, by HIS GRACE, to be more like him ~ showing kindness, grace and peace to those around us – not forgetting where our HOPE comes from. No matter what happens on November third, be encouraged by these words from Psalm 121. 

‘I lift my eyes toward the mountains. 

Where will my help come from? 

My help comes from the Lord, 

the Maker of heaven and earth. 

He will not allow your foot to slip; 

your Protector will not slumber. 

Indeed, the Protector of Israel does not slumber or sleep.

The Lord protects you; 

the Lord is a shelter right by your side. 

The sun will not strike you by day or the moon by night. 

The Lord will protect you from all harm; 

He will protect your life. 

The Lord will protect your coming and going both now and forever. ‘

Watermelon Woes

COVID – aka Coronavirus has ruined a LOT of things – graduations, sports, school, health, work, travel, weddings…. But, one positive (there are more, but I’ll highlight this one today) is that I was able to plant a garden this summer. Typically, we are gone for several weeks at a time over the summer traveling and leading mission teams (or school trips across the pond) so typically I cannot keep up with a garden. But, this year we are home. Kevin built me some raised garden beds in early June and by mid June I planted a variety of salady-leafy plants and herbs, beans, all kinds of tomatoes, all kinds of peppers, cucs and zucs, and watermelon! Gardening is delightful therapy for me – caring for the plants, watering, pulling weeds, and waiting in expectancy for the FRUIT of my labor. Ahhhhh, I picked a lovely banana pepper today! 

First banana pepper of the season!

One plant we have never had much success with in previous gardens is watermelon. This year, I planted a watermelon plant with plenty of space and have been overjoyed to see it flourish. I cannot wait for that juicy fruit to hit my taste buds! We have a baby one growing already and lots of flowers. 

Baby watermelon!

HOWEVER, my sweet little corona-puppy, Charli Joy, busted through the green garden fencing yesterday and did some digging in my garden beds! I was able to replant the jalapeño plant that was dug out and the spinach plants were broken (but I’m guessing they’ll come back). However, the watermelon plant – that was FLOURISHING – was torn from its vine and today is all wilty. I have replanted the part that broke off from the stem and watered it in hopes of becoming healthy again, but I am not optimistic that it will come back. The part of the stem that was left alone is still intact and I’m hopeful we’ll get some fruit from that section at least. To say I’m bummed is an understatement. 

Wilty watermelon :(((((

Tending to my wilty watermelon plant today reminded me of John 15. Jesus says in verse 5, “I am the vine; you are the branches. Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit. For apart from me you can do nothing. Anyone who does not remain… withers” (NLT). When the watermelon plant was separated from its main source of life, it became wilted and withered. It is not going to bear fruit (apart from a miracle of replanting the piece that was broken). *sad face* The same is true for those of us who call ourselves followers of Jesus – verse one calls him the grapevine. We are the branches. The watermelon was separated from its vine because of a pesky (albeit cute) puppy. We can be separated from Jesus because of our sin, or because we are not spending time with him in his word and prayer, or we are simply distracted in life and do not make our relationship with Jesus a priority. He is our lifesource, and when we are disconnected from him we get wilted and withered – just like my watermelon plant. 

However, when we remain in him (verse 7) we will produce FRUIT. In gardening, a recipe for fruit is lots of time in the sun, nightly waterings, and removing weeds that steal nutrients from the plants’ growth. In the same way, time with Jesus, studying and meditating on the word, growing with other believers (ie. church or groups), an active prayer life, and avoiding things that are not life-giving (life’s weeds) are the recipe for a vibrant life with Jesus resulting in abundant fruit. 

I don’t know about you but I don’t want a wilted and withered spiritual life. Jesus tells us to remain in God’s great love. This isn’t a chore, a task list, or a reprimand. It is seeded in his great love for us and leads us to JOY (see vs. 11). 

So today, what can you do to connect with the One True Grapevine? How can you remain in him this week to nurture your spiritual life and relationship with Jesus? 

Remain in Jesus through whatever means necessary and whatever works best for you. It could be listening to worship music or podcasts, doing a bible study or simply reading your Bible and journaling, praying, joining a lifegroup, or going to church (live or online). 

“Those who remain in me, and I in them, will produce much fruit” (John 15:5). 

Cherry tomatoes (FRUIT) on the way!! 🙂

The Christian Vote?

I’ve heard these two sayings over the years so I want to clear some things up wink:

🎯 There is NO WAY you can be a Christian and vote for Donald Trump.

🎯 There is NO WAY you can be a Christian and NOT vote for Donald Trump.

Wait what? 🤔🧐🥴 Stick with me here…

What does it mean to be a Christian? Sometimes people use the term Christ Follower. So, what does it mean to be a Christ Follower?

For 1000s of years it was predicted by scholars and religious leaders that a Messiah (a promised deliverer) was coming. Then, about 2000 years ago, Jesus was born. Lived a normal Jewish life with his Mom, Dad and siblings. However something was different about him. He didn’t talk back. He didn’t rebel against his parents. He was kind to everyone. He was perfect.

Jesus was/is the Son of God. Born to Mary and not conceived the normal way – because He was/is God’s Son. He came to this earth to point people to his Father, God, and became a “bridge” to God giving up his own life. See, we can’t get to God on our own. He is HOLY and perfect and well, we’re not. We have all messed up in one way or another. We don’t always have the best motives. We don’t always do and say the right things (Rom. 3:10-12, 23). But, because Jesus became a bridge to the Father in that he gave up his life and took OUR punishment (that we deserve) on himself, we can have a relationship with God (Rom. 3:24). 2 Cor. 5:21 puts it this way, “For God made Christ, who never sinned, to be the offering for our sin, so that we could be made right with God through Christ.”

Eph. 2:8-9 tells us this is a free GIFT. There’s nothing we can do to earn it. There’s also nothing so bad we could’ve done to not receive it. It’s a step of belief. Believe that Jesus is the Son of God. Believe that he loves you and wants the best, God’s best, for you. Confess and ask for forgiveness for what you haven’t done right and surrender to him to lead your life. Then, follow him. You won’t do everything right after you become a Christ-Follower – only he was perfect – but you will be forgiven. And your final destination when you leave this earth will be a glorious reunion with Jesus and God in heaven. 🥳😊🙌🤩🥰

“God is so rich in mercy, and he loved us so much, that even though we were dead because of our sins, he gave us life when he raised Christ from the dead. It is only by God’s grace that you have been saved (Eph. 2:4).

So, where does that leave us with a presidential election? I will tell you this, I have Christian friends who will vote for DT and I have Christian friends who will not vote for DT. Your status as a Christ-Follower is not dependent on for whom you vote. It is dependent on your trust in Jesus. Do elections matter? Of course. But what matters even more is what you have your hope in and where your hope comes from.

For me, that’s Jesus. He is my ROCK. My COUNSELOR. My DELIVERER. MY HOPE. My STRENGTH. He is my FRIEND. He is KIND. He is GOOD. He LOVES me – no matter how bad I mess up. He’s preparing a place for me when I leave this world. He’s got my back and my future. Without him I am nothing. In him I have abundant life – no matter what’s happening around me. He is my JOY.

While I can’t tell you who to vote for, I will leave you with this:

1. “Love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, all your mind, and all your strength…. and love your neighbor as yourself.” Mark 12:30-31 Love God, love others.

2. “If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you.“ James 1:5

3. “Keep on seeking, and you will find.” Matthew 7:7

Who HE says…

Image from Google Images

These past two days have been difficult. A situation in my life has created some emotional distress. Couple that with physical injuries (that I have been dealing with for over 8 months) that flare up with this stress and I’m a straight-up-hot-mess. The enemy wants me to be overtaken by the physical and emotional effects – but God has a few reminders about who HE says I am, and the HOPE I have in Him.

I’m not sharing this for pity (although I would appreciate prayer), but because it’s times like this that WHO I run to and WHO speaks to me is essential – life-giving. I’m not a Christian because I’ve done or said all the right things – I’m a Christian because I’ve recognized myself as a sinner and have turned to a SAVIOR. In return, Jesus has offered forgiveness and a hope of eternity in heaven with Him, but it doesn’t stop there. Jesus is alive and active and He cares about me (and YOU). His word is comfort to the hurting. He is so gracious and His grace to withstand trials is sufficient. THAT is why I’m sharing this – – because so many people mistakenly think that being a Christian or following Christ is just about a bunch of rules. But, it’s not. It’s about a Father who loves, a Savior who gave Himself and a Comforter who abides.

Beth Moore tweeted yesterday, “When your best efforts aren’t good enough, when you try your hardest & still fail to please, when you give your whole heart & it’s handed back to you in pieces, there is Jesus enthroned in majesty, delighting in you simply because you’re His. You are accepted in the beloved.”  Do you think it is a coincidence that I read that when that is exactly how I feel/felt? Neither do I. That is a gracious, loving Father, communicating that He hears and He cares and I am His.

Music is another way God is so faithful to communicate who He is and who I am in Him, because of Him. Yesterday, one song that spoke to me was “Promises Never Fail” by Bethel Music. The chorus says, “I know your thoughts, your plans for me are good. And I know you hold my future and my hope. Your promises never fail.”

Music, tweets, other people, sermon messages are all great ways that God communicates to us, but the most powerful is His WORD.

I think it’s no coincidence that Romans 5 was part of my Bible reading this week. Romans 5:3-4 says, “We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character. And character strengthens our confident HOPE of salvation.” God loves me so much He must think I need some character development – – and I don’t disagree. I think that will always be true this side of heaven. Because of my HOPE in GOD, I can trust that He has a plan for this situation and that He will use it in my life to make me more like Him.

Romans 5 also showed me what’s really important here… #focus. In verse 8 I’m reminded that “God showed his great love for us (me) by sending to Christ to die for us (me) while we were still sinners.” What a Savior that He would die for me – – so I can live for HIM.

I mentioned in our church’s devotional this week from Romans 4 that we can have all kinds of thoughts about all kinds of things – but what does the scripture say? THAT is what is most important.

Lauren Daigle sums it up with her song You say:

You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing

You say I am strong when I think I am weak

You say I am held when I am falling short

When I don’t belong, oh You say that I am Yours

The only thing that matters now is everything You think of me

In You I find my worth, in You I find my identity

In YOU I find my worth, in You I find my identity.

I don’t know how this situation will work out and subsequently what the future holds, but I know WHO holds my future in His hands and His plans for me are good and He is my HOPE.  He does the same for you.

Count it all JOY

2018 was a year of anticipation.  As the year began we looked forward to two graduations (me – MA from BGSU and Emma – graduating from high school),  a new job for Kevin, a new job for Julia, and a family VACATION – the first one in many many years!  And all of that was wonderful!  

Finishing my Masters was HARD and stretched me in ways I didn’t know I could stretch… and worth it.  I learned so much and I am confident that the process has helped me be a better teacher. Even though I lost a lot of TIME… and brain cells (or wait, did I gain some??)… I didn’t lose MYSELF.  I worked by booty off to still keep 1st things first – God / Family / Work – and stayed grounded in all that I know to be TRUE (Jesus, His Word…) despite various ideologies that were consistently presented (um, persuaded).  In the end – I summed it up on my graduation cap with “A DIOS sea la GLORIA” – To GOD be the GLORY” for what I was able to accomplish through Him. 

We enjoyed Emma’s last basketball and softball seasons and were proud of her many accomplishments as she graduated from high school and began college.  To GOD be the GLORY! 

We had a wonderful vacation in Ft. Myers Florida.  We stayed at a friend’s condo and enjoyed Ft. Myers Beach, Sanibel, Captiva Island – – the beaches, the seafood, the CAKE!  It was relaxing and fun and created memories that I will cherish forever.  

That’s where the record screeches to a halt – time stands still – and all that you know and love and plan is literally changed in an instant.  I’ve already shared about the accident here and here and here,  and I supposed this is not the last you will hear of it – major life instances take time to process.  But GOD  – who I trust in and believe in and LOVE, works (is working) all things for good.  

I would not wish a major car accident on my worst enemy – in fact it is a mother’s worst nightmare to receive a call that their kiddo has been in an accident (in this case we were together in the accident, but it’s still a nightmare/fear).   And this accident could’ve been a million times worse… just a millisecond later.  TO GOD BE THE GLORY!  That horrific evening, however, changed the trajectory of the remainder of 2018.  The last six months has been filled with physical and emotional pain, broken bones, bruised bodies – and spirits, disappointments and many appointments,  discouragement, decisions, frustrations, mental replays, reality checks and unexpected anxiety.   But despite all of that I can honestly sit before you today, because of my relationship with Christ, and COUNT IT ALL JOY. 

James says it this way – “Consider it a great JOY, my brothers, whenever you experience various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance.” James 1:2-3

Paul explains that, “‘We also rejoice in our afflictions, because we know that affliction produces endurance, endurance produces proven character, and proven character produces hope. This hope will not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured out in our hearts through the Holy Spirit who was given to us.’” Romans 5:3-5

I always thought that SOMEDAY – when I can say that I can count my TRIAL(S) as JOY I will FINALLY be a mature Christian.  HA!   Well, I am counting this joy – but I definitely have a LONG way to go to continue growing in my walk with Christ – I’m thankful He’s giving me the opportunity to continue the journey.

 *I count it JOY that we experienced/are experiencing this trial because I know that God is using it to grow us, strengthening our endurance and faith. 

* I count it JOY because my physical body can endure WAY MORE than I would’ve ever thought and by His hand of healing is getting stronger every day.  I WILL walk my dog around the reservoir in 2019 and I can. not. wait. 

*I count it JOY that when I have felt relationally alone on this journey, when it feels like no one cares/understands, I am never alone and HE CARES FOR ME (1 Peter 5:7). 

*I count it JOY because I truly can do ALL THINGS through CHRIST who gives me STRENGTH (Phil. 4:13).   This is not a sports verse – this is a verse about being content in a hardship. And when every step hurt and when the replays diminish sleep and when fear creeps in and what ifs paralyze, CHRIST is the One who has given me strength. He is so faithful. 

*I count it JOY because of the many health professionals who have taken good care of us.  Special shout out to our friends @ Opti-Health Physical Therapy.  The PTs and PTAs have definitely been a bright spot of this healing journey – for both Emma and myself.   

*I count it JOY because I now have the car I’ve wanted… just a few years earlier than planned (and with a payment – HA!).  But really, I do like my car and I’m thankful for it :).

*I count it all JOY because of the HOPE I have in Christ has been strengthened, renewed and present.  His hope does not disappoint – God’s love has ben poured out to my heart through the Holy Spirit throughout this journey.  I can’t imagine this accident not happening and I am thankful for His sufficient grace and presence in my life because of it.  To GOD be the GLORY. 

What are some things you fear?   Let me encourage you that should XYZ happen, God is faithful, gracious, constant, loving and sufficient for whatever you may face in the coming year.  In this world we will have trouble (John 16:33), but He does not leave us to deal with it alone (Heb. 13:5).  And that, is how we can have JOY in the journey. 

2019 will surely bring some GREAT times and will surely bring some hardship.  My hope is that God will continue to give me eyes to see the JOY in the journey.

Postscript: Upon some further reflection, I am declaring (after the fact) that JOY is (was) my word for 2018.  With counting trials as JOY, and with faith producing steadfastness (in the ESV, endurance in the HCSB) comes some responsibility.  James 1:4 says “endurance must do its complete work” in the HCSB, but worded a little bit differently in the ESV, it says “and let STEADFASTNESS have its full effect.”  Whoa – LET it work.  Trust the process. Don’t just drown in the intensity and the self-pity and the weight of the trials.  I can already testify that the trials of this past year have created opportunities for God to work IN me, now I must let steadfastness have its full effect so I can be “perfect (mature) and complete” … “lacking nothing.”  Lacking nothing.  When all I need/want is God.  

Trials ->  grow the genuineness of faith -> resulting in praise, glory and honor at the revelation of Jesus (1 Peter 1:7).

Trials -> rejoice with GREAT JOY -> revelation of Jesus (1 Pet. 4:1-13).

When the trials come, and we count as JOY because of the work He is doing in/through them, and remain steadfast, keeping the focus on HIM, He gets the glory – all honor goes to HIM.  And that’s the way it should be.   

Lord – help me to be steadfast in these trials you have entrusted to me and in the trials (and joys) to come, so that YOU may receive the honor and glory and praise.  Amen 

(Previous Words)

2018 JOY (this Post)

2017 – Didn’t declare a word – – could’ve been “survival” or “hustle.”

2016 PERSPECTIVE

2015 It’s whatever, man

2014 FOLLOW

2013 THRIVE

2012 RESTORE

Picture Perfect

We don’t post broken stuff on social media. We post the happy, what shines and what is bright. Keep in mind, however, that all that glitters is not gold. 

The first picture is a broken ornament.  It fell tonight while taking down the tree (yes it is early for us to take down the tree, but I’m making room for something special :-)). I wouldn’t normally post a picture of a broken ornament, or taking down my tree for that matter, but something I read earlier today has been resonating in my mind over and over… 

“We’re just actually all people in need of a Savior.”

-from an article on ChurchLeaders.com

My cuties (aka pups) take up a lot of my timelines.  Never mind that they  (one culprit in particular) have eaten about half of the GrubFam Cookie-Palooza – – my waistline thanks you – – but they have been ornery little “poop emojis”!! And tonight they somehow got into an open drawer in the upstairs bathroom and tore up some feminine products as if they were the chew toys in their stockings! 

The second pic is from a shopping trip in Toledo from 2012.  We laugh about it now, but I
purchased that ornament to be facetious. To put in perspective our financial status – the kiddos were on reduced lunch @ school (that’s seems like an oxymoron – if you’re from this area you know why – but alas was our reality throughout many years of ministry).  I’m not saying that to mope or get pity, but so you can understand the background of the ornament purchase.  We were shopping @ Franklin Park – trying to meet all the unspoken expectations of present purchases for all the people, including our own littles, despite the scrawny number in our bank account.  Going to the Toledo Mall was like eye candy and the Grub Kiddos had a strong case of the wantsies… and Mr. and Mrs. Grub had a strong case of “intense fellowship.”  I remember there was a Best Buy mini-store in the mall… and, being facetious/sarcastic/itchy (with a b), I was like – hey – who wants a new IPOD – oh look – let’s get the new gaming system – new BEATS headphones for EVERYONE! HA!  Whatever you want – – it’s YOURS!  The kids eyes were the size of cannonballs and all of the sudden no one wanted anything.  Just call me BUZZ KILL MAMA! Then, we walked by the ornament kiosk where the “perfect families” get their “perfect family” ornaments with their “perfect names” and the “perfect date.”  HA!  You better believe I was getting our “perfect family” ornament.  I chose one with five SMILEY snowmen tobogganing down the HAPPY. HILL. OF. LIFE.  L.O.L. 

The bottom line is we weren’t a perfect family then and we aren’t a perfect family now.  We are selfish, annoying, sinful, greedy, hurtful people in need of a Savior daily.

That’s who Jesus came for.  People like you and me, who despite our best efforts, are not good enough – we mess up, we fail, we fall short.  Jesus came to reconcile our brokenness, our sinfulness, even our facades to Himself. ‘When Jesus heard this, He told them, “Those who are well don’t need a doctor, but the sick do need one. I didn’t come to call the righteous, but sinners.” ‘ Mark 2:17 https://my.bible.com/bible/72/MRK.2.17

Jesus came for the broken ornaments (relationships, dreams, expectations) in our lives and the picture-perfect ornaments masking a horrible, no-good, very bad shopping trip (sin, disappointment, sadness, hurt, deficiency).  And so when you see the perfect family/church member/co-worker/neighbor/home/student/dog 🙂 you can be darn well sure that despite the social media shiny and bright, they’re just someone who struggles (or has struggled) with xyz, and they’re actually just a normal person in need of a Savior.  We all are.

Following Jesus is about real life and real life is messy.  So maybe this Christmas season and New Year,  we can take off the masks, be a little more open, share a little more grace, be a little more patient because “we’re just actually all people in need of a Savior.”

I Called to the Lord

Psalm 120:1 says, “In my distress I called to the Lord and he answered me.”

In the scary moments after our split second accident, last July, Emma and I could not get out of the car at first. She said “I’m OK. I’m OK”, I said, “I’m OK,” and I grabbed her hand and cried out, “Jesus, help us.”  JESUS HELP US!

This was not a flowery prayer or a long, drawn out prayer exercise following an acronym for proper prayers to be lifted up. This was not a perfectly written quote with a comma before the One we were addressing… This was –  in our distress we called out to God – and He answered us. 

I tried my door again and could open it.  Miracle? I don’t know, but we did just call out to God.  I’ll leave that up to you to decide. 

That prayer has sustained us throughout these past four months as we deal with the emotional and physical aspects of being in a traumatic car accident.  JESUS HELP US. And He is near.  

I don’t know where you’re at in life, but I do know whatever you’re facing you too can cry out – Jesus, help me – in your distress and He will answer you.   What you need help with may not disappear in a split second (in this world you will have troubles…) – or it may – but He will be near in the process, faithful to use it in your life and give strength for the journey.   

I cannot sing this song @ church (by Bethel Music) without crying as I reflect on God’s goodness, nearness and faithfulness. 

“I will sing of all you’ve done

I’ll remember how far you carried me

From beginning until the end

You are faithful, faithful to the end.” 

And if that doesn’t get me – which it does, then we get to this part…

“THERE WASN’T A DAY

THAT YOU WEREN’T BY MY SIDE

There wasn’t a day

That You let me fall

All of my life

Your love has been true

All of my life

I will worship you.” 

THIS is why I’m passionate about sharing Christ.   It’s not about rules or what we believe or don’t believe as Christians, but it is about a relationship with a LOVING Father who cares, who is compassionate, who is GOOD.  It’s about His Son who took my place on a brutal cross so we could have forgiveness for our wretched ways and access to this loving Father.  It’s about a Holy Spirit who guides but also provides supernatural comfort and strength.  Life is hard, y’all. You don’t have to have a car accident to make that statement.   I could write 1000 pages of the faithfulness of Christ in my life through hard things (many written in this blog).  Don’t go it alone when the One who created you longs to be there for you.  

The Sacred Slow – a book review :)

It’s been a while since I’ve reviewed a book, so when “Sacred Slow” showed up at my house (even though I hadn’t requested it or offered to review it) I thought… God must have a purpose in me reading/reviewing this.A book about creating margin and being still before God was exactly what my soul needed after a crazy busy three years being back in teaching with a full load – – and accidentally getting my Masters – – and just about the busiest time as a parent with three active teenagers.   Yes, let’s slow down.  Let’s be still.

So, I started this in early June.  There’s 52 days of devotions and response activities to complete, and it is even advised to take a few days to reflect on one chapter so it can take even up to 52 weeks to complete (hey – that’s a full year) if you really want to chew on the concepts, reflect on what God is showing you and truly find the sacred in the slow.

On p. 3 Alicia Britt Chole writes, “Relationship with God is best fed by a steady practice of attentivenessto God.”    The book is divided into twelve movements and the first movement is a reminder that God is with us and to take the time to focus on Him.  Listening and attentiveness leads us to REST in Jesus. In this crazy world of over-scheduled chaos, this book provides practical and biblical ways to build in and intentionally have days/seasons/hours of a sacred slow.

For me, on a personal level, the irony of the timing of doing this devotional of slowing my booty down is not lost on me when a life circumstance slowwwwwed me down…. After a car accident this summer, God was faithful and gracious to show me in my slowed-downedness (is that a word?) that He is with me and that my rest and healing would come from being with Him.  Life crises tend to open the door to intimacy with the Savior and I don’t believe it was a mistake that I was already in the process of this sacred slow journey when this happened.  The Lord is so good.

All of that being said, I would recommend this book/journey/intentionality to anyone that is seeking a reprieve from the chaos, peace in the rat-race and practical application of stillness with the Father.  The first few months of “back to school” are always a busy season for me, so I’d love to hear – what are some ways that you create margin and intentionality in your time with Jesus in chaotic and time-pressed seasons?

 

I did receive this book for free in exchange for an honest review, positive or negative, as a contributing member of the Booklook Bloggers.

His GRACE is Sufficient

I’ve always wanted a tattoo, but was not going to get one until I knew exactly what I wanted…

Throughout my walk as a Christian, in any sort of valley or hard time, God’s Spirit is always faithful to whisper to mine that His Grace us sufficient.

It’s hard.  My grace is sufficient.

I can’t.  My grace is sufficient.

It’s impossible.  My grace is sufficient.

There’s no way out. My grace is sufficient.

It’s unfair. My grace is sufficient.

It hurts. My grace is sufficient.

I’m alone.  My grace is sufficient.

It became quite clear that if I ever got a tattoo, it was going to include at least the word GRACE, if not this verse in some way, shape or form.

With the word or verse about grace, I wanted the tat to be pretty and feminine.  I thought it would be nice to accent with a flower, and since Gerbera Daisies are one of my favorite flowers I created some designs with a daisy. I tried yellow and pink with different placements.  I liked what I was coming up with, but I never felt like this is it.  And I wasn’t going to get the tat until I was sure.

Throughout a particularly loooong and brutal season, God’s promise that His grace is sufficient continued to be a lifeline of hopein dark days and difficult moments.  In that valley I heard the song “Amaryllis” on Christy Nockel’s Christmas album.  The words are so precious and spoke so deep to my heart that that year for Christmas I printed off the lyrics and bought several friends and family members an Amaryllis plant for Christmas.

Photo by Nastasia on Pexels.com

“Here I am waiting
In a winter of my own
If it’s gonna be this cold here
Why couldn’t it just snow?
At least I could say through the pain
That it’s somehow beautiful…
And everybody knows that the time to bloom is spring,
But You’re asking me to break through the hardness of this freeze
And You say that You’re with me
And I can make it through anything….

Like an Amaryllis, blooming at Christmas,
When everything is cold and dark
Your love breaks through and I shine
With the brilliance of summer,
Right in the middle of winter!
Somehow surprising the night
Like a Christmas Amaryllis…”

In the coldest and darkest days, God was growing me, creating something beautiful, making all things new. He is doing the same for you. He works ALL things for good for those of us that love Him and are called according to His purposes (Romans 8:28).  God is a constant, even in the dark and His work breaks through the toughest, hardest, frozen soil.

Jesus did and does that for us. When it seems like there’s no hope, no way out, when it’s unfair, it hurts and you’re alone.  When you can not. The Light of Life comes.

Talk about a winter
The world had never known,
Talk about a silence
That hardened up the soil;
No more life left in Eden,
But You knew the time would come…
‘Cause You were growing up a family
That You would call Your own,
And through a fragile people
The Light of Life would come,
And when it seemed like we’d never see Spring,
Heaven gave a King!

So, I ditched the Gerbera and redesigned my sketches with an Amaryllis flower. It’s a perfect representation of the work that Christ does in the winter of our lives. He is with us. He is creating something new.  And even through the tough, hard soil, something beautiful can come from it.  The work He does in us is an Amaryllis flower, with the “brilliance of summer”in the midst of the winters.

Finally, while I was studying in Spain last summer, my roommate had a few tattoos and I shared with her the plan for my tattoo.  She was hype for me to get the tattoo while in Spain and I was down for that – – so I made one final edit… Su gracia es suficienteand switched it to Spanish.  Spain, the Spanish language, how God has allowed me to use Spanish in my life… that was the nicely tied bow on top of the gift, so to speak. 🙂

I didn’t end up getting the tat in Spain but earlier this year in 2018 I did.   The Holy Spirit is my first reminder of His precious, sufficient grace in my life, but this tat is a close second.  Laying on a gurney after the car accident, alone for the moment in my room in the ER, in pain, scared, thankful, nervous, overwhelmed – I glanced at my right arm and there it was.  His GRACE is sufficient.  Su GRACIA es suficiente.  In my spirit I knew that this was going to be another winter season, there was going to be some hard, frozen ground to plow through – and it has, and I have – – but I have confidence in His work through this trial that He’s at work in and through me, making all things new.

“There are the rare and beautiful treasures
That grow when it’s coldest
When nobody’s watching…
Sending a message to a sleeping world
That You are here with us now
And You are making all things new again…”

His GRACE truly is sufficient.